Flipflops in the Rain


disclaimer.

i had a good friend contact me today, concerned that whenever he heard from me, i seemed somewhat less-than-pleased with life, and that he sensed “the slightest twinge of regret” about my decision to jump ship and move across the country. the east-coast loving half of my psyche cringed….

it’s definitely time i explain myself.

i write when i’m upset. i write when i’m confused. i write when i really need to unleash my thoughts, as wild and erratic as they may be. i rarely write when i’m content and happy with the day-to-day events in my life. sadly, this means i write e-mails, letters, blog posts, thank you cards, graduation speeches, lullabies, etc., when i’m not completely 100 percent. and if you know me really well, you know i’m not one to keep things to myself. so, again — i unleash my problems to the world.

i don’t wanna be that girl. the whiny, bitchy, silently fuming snob standing in the corner, writing her own obituary while everyone else peacefully moves on with their day. And honestly, i’m not that girl. but sometimes, i really can’t hide my emotions. and when i can’t, i vent via paper/electronic submission form. once upon a time, it was just my diary (and my mother who secretly read my diary) who saw my inner demons. now, because it’s 2007 when everyone and their dad has a blog, all of my lucky readers get to see me for who i really am.

so i’m gonna lay it out there just this once — i am so glad i moved out here. the area, the people, the cat i adopted, the experience — all of it has helped me figure out what i truly want out of life (cheeeeeesy… sorry). but yes, there are times i doubt myself. i will never regret the choices i’ve made, and i refuse to let these choices define me (except for the decisions that make me happy!), but i will unfortunately show moments of weakness.

and i will show them here.