Flipflops in the Rain

proper houseguest etiquette, according to my cat.
December 22, 2007, 9:33 pm
Filed under: the cat's meow | Tags: , , , , , , ,

1. waltz in like you own the place, particularly if another cat lives there.

2. immediately steal food, preferably from other cat.

3. immediately score treats, preferably treats belonging to other cat.

4. leave your scent on everything, especially other cat’s favorite nooks, crannies and catnip-infused toys.

5. hiss at other cat. earn extra points if other cat hides on top of refrigerator for the rest of the night.

6. cuddle up to humans, favoring other cat’s owner.

7. challenge other cat to staring contest, while also blocking his direct route to food dish.

8.  look pretty while performing all of the above in hopes that no one suspects a thing.

pure and wholesome.
November 13, 2007, 7:47 pm
Filed under: perfectly impossible | Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Reasons Whole Foods kicks ass in comparison to the average grocery store:

– The produce is actually edible.
– Samples are prevalent.
– I’m always tempted to (and usually do) try something new.
– I have yet to run headfirst into someone who looks like a serial killer.
– It’s less than a mile from my apartment.
– Fresh seafood and delicious ready-made-meals are available at any time of day.
– For some reason, screaming children are nowhere to be found.
– Everything’s a bit pricy, so I only buy what I can eat.
– The wine aisle is amazing.
– I’m not the only person walking around in flipflops in November.
– I always feel healthy and wholesome — even when I’m buying frozen dinners and cheese.

Reasons it doesn’t matter where I shop:
– I still forget the item for which I specifically went to the store.
– It’s only slightly less boring. I hate grocery shopping.

seven: carrie b.
October 26, 2007, 7:41 am
Filed under: 24 words, work and play | Tags: , , , ,

thanks for bringing homemade cinnamon rolls to work this morning and helping me ruin my diet even more. my sweet tooth especially appreciates you!